Holidays

I got through Christmas. I got through New Years. And I got through a week away in the snow. I don't know why we feel we have to congratulate ourselves for this. But we do. None of it was actually that hard. But it still irks me that no one really gets it. My hubby and in laws don't get why I don't drink, why I can't just have one and that I'll never drink again. Cue Christmas carols in our local square, in the cold mist, the smell of mulled wine wafting through. My father in law, meaning well, asks if I want any, of course I do! I'd love nothing more than to have a mulled wine, and another, the feeling of the warm smooth liquid going down my throat, hitting my tummy and the wonderful feeling of the alcohol hitting my brain. I say no but he mishears and gets me one. Of course I don't drink it which causes a few raised eyebrows as he's sure I said yes. Cue dinners out when I'd love nothing more than to have a say in what wine is purchased and partake in the celebratory bubbles followed by a nice, deep French red. Umm, just the Perrier for me please. Christmas day was actually ok. Normally I'm into the bubbles by 9am. This time no one started drinking until lunchtime. I was driving anyway and just made sure I had my non alcoholic bubbles topped up. New Years was actually great. The kids were sick so we didn't last long initially at the local dinner/party but I did manage to drag Miss 8 back just before midnight though to do some dancing and do the happy new year thing. There's nothing better than getting on the dance floor to take your mind off the fact that you haven't got an alcoholic drink in your hand. And once you say no once people don't care that you're not drinking - it's yourself who has to come to terms with it. We've just got back from a week away in the snow. It was the first time the girls had seen snow so was pretty special. The gite owners "kindly" left a bottle of red wine for us. Hubby quietly polished that off. The drive to the ski slope was pretty hairy - we didn't have chains and although the road was pretty clear there were a few spots which were pretty icy. I was driving and drove all the way up in 2nd gear. Pretty nerve wracking, especially as the mist started to close in as soon as we got there. Again the smell of mulled wine wafting from the café. I had a coffee instead. Later hubby said to me " I thought you'd treat yourself to a wine after the drive up there, you deserved it." Really? Lost for words. Absolutely lost for words. Being sober is a lonely place.